Family Based Youth Ministry One

I attended an 8 hour "deep track" on Family-Based Youth Ministry that was really good. Some of the key points:

Jim Burns:

FBYM does NOT mean we stop having "kid-with-kid" youth ministry. Some are saying it means just talking to parents and letting parents do it all. Nope.

FBYM is NOT A PROGRAM but a MINDSET.

It DOES mean we add the mission of "helping families succeed" to our list of things to do.

What are our barriers to doing that? 1. Too busy already
2. Easier to talk to kids than parents - not comfortable talking to them
3. Parents are not open to help - "I don't really like my kids and you can't make me"
4. Youth worker has no/limited influence on adult education program
5. Senior pastor is actually threatened by the youth worker talking to parents - having a close relationship - closer than his/hers

So what is the youth worker to do? - think of yourself as a FACILITATOR..

1. Inform - parent nights DONE WELL - biggest reason parents don't come is that they are thrown together and not done well - have great food, great program, personal invitations
AND do in-home visits with families - build relationships - parents will then seek you out

2. Assist - do panels, seminars on communicating with teenagers - understand culture; how to talk about sex, drugs, gangs; he offered a seminar in "how to get a scholarship" that attracted LOTS of parents; Develop a list of local counselors, so that when outside help is needed, you are ready

3. Encourage - parents support group, parents recognition dinner, write notes to kids AND parents; overall, acknowledge that being a parent of teens is stressful

4. Involve - parents advisory council, parent-teen socials, banquets, retreats

Understand that LOTS of families are DISFUNCTIONAL to varying degrees and need help. Divorce is the most frequent issue we will encounter.